


Bork Bork

by fingalsanteater



Series: Fandom Secrets Crack Ficlet Extravaganza [3]
Category: Real Person Fiction, The Muppet Show, The Muppets - All Media Types
Genre: Chefs, Crack, M/M, Muppet Sex, Rimming, just for fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-08
Updated: 2014-02-08
Packaged: 2018-01-11 15:43:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1174845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fingalsanteater/pseuds/fingalsanteater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Swedish Chef and Gordon Ramsay make a mess of the mise en place while stoking the flames of their lust.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bork Bork

**Author's Note:**

> Crack fic inspired by a secret posted on the DW comm Fandom Secrets. Link to the thread [here](http://fandomsecrets.dreamwidth.org/933509.html?thread=707146629#cmt707146629).

"Bork bork," said the Swedish Chef, huskily. His hands caressed the lapels of Gordon's chef jacket, teasing. Though the Swedish Chef's eyes were obscured by his caterpillar brows, Gordon knew he would see longing in them.  
  
Their desire had simmered for far too long and they couldn't stave off their want-- their _need_ \-- for each other any more.  
  
Swedish Chef stripped off Gordon's jacket and pants with a surprising grace, a contrast to his normal fumbling and bumbling. The thought that he could rein in his clumsiness in order to get Gordon naked made Gordon's arousal burn through him like a flambe.  
  
Divesting Swedish Chef of his clothing was a bit more difficult as they had strings to contend with, but once it was done Gordon was pleased to see the puppet was... endowed. To say the least.  
  
"Hergy durg?" His arms wide, inviting Gordon to look his share, he seemed to be asking if Gordon liked what he saw. And he did. Oh, he did.  
  
Gordon liked it so much, he dropped to his knees to worship Swedish Chef's gigantic cock. Taking it in his mouth, he discovered it felt a bit like soft leather. It was firm, yet yielding and Gordon sucked Swedish Chef's hard dick greedily.  
  
Gordon's own dick was surging with arousal. Swedish Chef's hand was in Gordon's hair, fingers tugging at his roots, pulling him off with a wet pop. Gordon let out a pitiful moan that he'd deny later.  
  
"A burshing lurgen, a gerdy durgan." The filthy proposal went straight to Gordon's cock and he eagerly bent himself over the counter, tipping over a bowl of sliced zucchini in the process. Gordon spread his ass cheeks wide, awaiting the ecstasy soon to come. Swedish Chef's felt lips rubbed against his taut cheeks, marking a static-y trail to his hole. The first swipe of Swedish Chef's tongue almost caused Gordon to loose it, and he cursed- a drawn out _fuuuuuuuuuuuuck_ wrenched from him.  
  
Swedish Chef didn't pause to let Gordon catch his breath, he thrust his tongue in and fucked Gordon senseless. It was only when Gordon moaned, "Please," Swedish Chef reach around and fisted his cock until Gordon came all over his long fingers, spewing loud obscenities at how ungodly good this felt. The Swedish Chef murmered "bork bork bork," tongue fucking Gordon through his orgasm.  
  
Gordon was in a daze after he came, but even his post-orgasm glow couldn't obscure the fact that the Swedish Chef was now pressing his large cock against Gordon's wet hole. He didn't try to press in, just rubbed himself between Gordon's ass cheeks.

"Fucking hell." Gordon moaned.

He reached back, and rubbing Swedish Chef with his hand. When he came, Gordon felt the hot squirt on his back, several long spurts, and then the Swedish Chef leaned heavy against him, resting his forehead on Gordon's back.  
  
"Bork bork. Flurgan yurgan," he said, breathless.  
  
"Oh, there'll be a next time," Gordon agreed eagerly.


End file.
